Me. At least after what I've been through.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
