um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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