So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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