you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
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you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
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On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
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