matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
She even gives head with a lisp.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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