Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize