it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
