it hurts more in the daytime
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Randomize
