I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
