So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
