You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
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