No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
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