Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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