I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
