I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
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