the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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