You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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