Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
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