Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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