You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
