For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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