Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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