their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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