I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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