Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
