windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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