If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
