i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
