question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
