Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
