he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'm getting married
To pizza
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
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