If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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