Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
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I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
your like the ambassador to my penis.
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I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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