Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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