this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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