How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
