She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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