Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
