dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
