pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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