sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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