Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
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