So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
