i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
