sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
