he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
what day is it and did you see me today?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
