How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
