this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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