apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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