Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
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